- #FF The wonderful @carolrhartsell. #
- Kevin Costner, I promise to give The Postman a second chance if your oil cleaning machines actually help to clean up the Gulf. #
- Why wasn't Kevin Costner on the field?!!! #worldcup #
- Leaving soon to go host The Friars Club Sketch Competition at UCB. Come see one group win $10,000 tonight! http://bit.ly/bee3T0 #
- I'm doing it. I'm making the full time move to the fist bump. #
- I don't think it's right that this show about OCD gives you the option to keep starting it over. http://twitpic.com/20m895 #
- Early Alternate Titles For While You Were Sleeping: While You Were Sleeping, I Peeked at Your Vagina #
- Watch Adam Sandler and @jimmyfallon during a commercial break discuss the "Sandler Sneeze." http://bit.ly/cvx4zB #
- People are more amazed by the wifi in an airplane then they are to be FLYING in an airplane. #
- I have a relative in jail. Turns out he's illegally blind. #
- RT @ChelseaVPeretti TONIGHT! Watch @louisck's new show "Louie" at 11pm on FX. 2 episodes back to back! #
- The next time a photographer asks you to say cheese, say keys, he'll have no idea! #crazythingstodo #
- If I hear that Kars For Kids radio jingle one more time I'm going to jump out a window. (You can give my car to a kid if I do) #
- The final episode of Larry King Live better answer all the unanswered questions or I'm gonna be pissed. #
- Jared, the Subway Guy, is getting married this summer! (His six inch tuna is very compatible with her open face roast beef.) #
- "Doobie dah dah dah." -Sarah McLachlan #
- You workin' hard or hardly workin'?
Shut up asshole. #
- Lethal Weapon 5: Can I Have a New Partner? #
- How could someone who made such great decisions throughout The Sixth Sense make such poor ones ever since? #
- It's another installment of "Totally Terrific Tweets!" (perhaps you're on the list) http://bit.ly/cqwCwo #FF #
- "Can I have a tissue?" "Tissue? I barely know you!" "My nose is running. Give me the tissue first and then we can joke around." #
- When I looked up the word dictionary in the dictionary I was hoping it would say "this" but it didn't. #
